The Lovers March to Eternity

There is so much fire burning within, smoldering wishes for love’s life to begin.

Life again as it was when I was young with our free hearts of passion entwining as one; experiencing the world joined together – souls lit with the promise of plenty forever – an imaginative history created before it begins, these are the things that young hearts believe in.

The embers lost daily to life’s routine this poem starts from loss, sorrow; misplaced dreams.

There is much to be said for the commitment and respect, for the sanctity of marriage so as not to regret, but if you find yourself lost then you must start again and remember what passions were in you as life began.

And then you have no choice for you must decide to take the path well worn and traveled or challenge the ride. I’m not sure what I have in me, the strength or the hope to make my dreams be in this swirling of smoke- it burns, burns my eyes, burdens my soul, weighs me down into restraining control.

I must find again the desire, the longing, the belief; passion and fortitude within me I seek, vulnerability held gently as I fight to hold on. I ask, dare I bask in the prosperous riches of risk -to begin again though I’m still lost in the mist.

Though the scars of careless openness still hang weary on my soul, I remain determined, steadfast and bold.

Still vigilantly marching upon the sublime dogged foes, the constant companions of the “average Joes”, they will have to be sacrificed for my love to be free, they will have to be sacrificed for me to be me.

I will find what I live for!  Valiant, golden and bright! … for I am, forever my Father’s delight.

And with His constant direction of warmth and hope, together my love and I will march to the end of the road; where I’ll look upon your face and thank Heaven above for His unending support of our perilous love.

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The Duel of the Poet

Staring at a blank paper for hours at a time.
I search over and over the spaces of my mind
trying desperately to find the right words to unleash upon the world.

My mind wanders through courtyards, down back alleys  – my imagination flies over majestic mountains and moonlit streams.
I am jotting down words and phrases
in an unorganized jumble that is my mind across the page.

Disgusted with frustration for this process that eludes me, I crumple the paper discarding it with the rest in an overflowing basket in the corner;
words, ideas, thoughts once again overtake my mind and
slowly, with great care, out of the jumble I pick a choice few and
jot them down again only to scrap these fakers once again.

Lastly, after my forced wit and imagination have run dry,
after I’ve given up the effort to maintain logic and cadence to written emotions that long to be free,  I abandon control,
wrung out and exhausted from the tussle now finally willing
to allow my feelings to gracefully pen themselves
with liquid stealth across my once blank and foreboding page.

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A New Beginning

Something woke me this morning
I could not tell you what
it was just a feeling
a strange feeling that I got.

I was not quite awake
but had to go outside
for the sun was shining brightly
through my window open wide.

I stepped upon the grass
so moist beneath my feet
the sun was big and yellow
and brought tremendous heat.

I danced through the grass
and smelled the clean fresh air
the feeling grew stronger
as the wind tossed my hair.

I guess it was that feeling
of warmth in my heart
that early this morning
moved my anger to depart.

Now with His divine blessing
I’m enjoying every time
the morning brings a new day
and the evening rest in time.

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In Thanks and Praise to My Heavenly Father

In your loving arms I find my strength when I am weary of life’s trials, distractions and relentlessness. Bringing me to the cosmic heights of beauty dancing feet upon the floor, head high, fingers curved gracefully sharing meaning to their world as they flutter high and low.

In these blessed moments You lift me, Your wonders lift me as if by a gossamer thread upon which kaleidoscopes of brilliant, prismatic color beam and I can see the world clearly shining through Your eyes – it’s beauty, it’s majesty, it’s potential, it’s height, it’s depth and it’s truth.

Oh my wonderful Father, how but could I not love you with the whole of my heart and soul when you so graciously bestow upon me moments such as these;

I love you with every breath, with every beat.

Though times there is despair, fear, anxiety and worry and this – they bring me down.  The pit is so deep and so close and I dance around it bending poetically to peer inside, it’s tempting to stop the dancer and the dance, to stop the vigilant light – which flickers and wavers ever so slightly this time as if an ominous breath passed briefly through – then Your majesty and once again the sun and the joy and the love; and the music changes and the steps once so heavy and laden move like a pixie prancing with joy for you.

Whenever I am lonely and afraid and once again find myself dancing precariously close to the pit – I pray you save me oh Lord, as you do and fill me with your love so the breath of life may raise me to the highest heights to share my love with You and the world you gave your only Son to.

Praises to the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost – in your humble name I pray -Amen

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Compliance and Conformity

In a world so obsessed with convention and conformity my once childhood friend sought escape and she ran to freedom, drilling through numb crowds, searing streets and the endless mind-numbing congestion. Though she knew not where she was going or how to find where she belonged, the need to be was so great that it propelled her on. And I, I watched, rooted to the ground that held our playful days but my eyes free to roam tried desperately to hold her back– pin her down, bring her home and make her mine once again. To no avail- she disappeared but never the longing left my heart.

Years passed, decades passed – day upon day, each marking a step older, wiser maybe – so much overgrowth collected over the years needing to be pruned to blend in and prosper- and I am grown, having beaten down that well worn path taken by so many.

I think of my beloved lost friend often, my ever young little gnome and occasionally I even think I catch a glimpse – a playful smile as I pass the mirror, a rolling laugh, cloud animals passing in a lazy summer sky, distant rumblings of giants bowling over head or days when the fairies just barely skip around a dancing flower to hide before I catch glimpse.

Time to remember childhood forts, empty boxes and oh the places we would go in a seemingly never-ending plethora of adventures and dreams.

One day, this day we will reunite – a reunion years in the making – though she’s not changed at all a virtual Peter Pan and I need her to restore me and she comes finally home as I close my eyes and open my mind and let us dance freely – my lost imagination returned finally to me. And we shall explore this world together, never apart again as I’m only a withered version of myself without her – the light of my soul and my heart given to me so blessedly by my Father as a perpetual way to enjoy all life has to offer and the world lays out before us – bright, shining and free from compliance and conformity.

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Night of Winter

Alone, hear the wind howl in the night,
cold hearted world, alone in fright.
Lord!  Hear my prayers, help me within,
I wish to be wise in a world rich with sin.
Thickened by snow, cold and white,
gone from fear in a harsh quite night.

Where to go when all is gone?
Who only knows the sorrow of my lonely song?

What have I left but the promise of sleep
a peaceful one, quite and deep
like the snow that blankets the sweet green grass
so my death shall come to pass.

I’m sorry the loved I leave behind
but only pain fills my mind.

Lost are the things nearest and dearest to me
fear and loneliness are all I can foresee

I will not blame for what I’ve become
for with the Earth and God  I am one.

Please forgive me, I know you tried!
As did others, but I cannot lie
I wish for only peace
and peaceful I shall die.

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A Key of Trust

My thoughts are locked far from reach
and only I have the key.

They are all I have that truly show myself
if I should trust you enough
to give you the key to my thoughts
I would give you the greatest gift.

My feelings and thoughts are kept from most
and revealing them to you means ultimate vulnerability.

I give you the key to my being and
I am not mistaken to place my trust in you
for you give me your innermost thoughts in return.

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Believe in a Dream

Love is the most beautiful thing;
and to believe that you love me would mean believing in a dream.

But when you say you love me, I must believe it is true;
for I want it so badly – to believe in you.

I love you in my heart, I want you in my mind;
my true love I never thought in you I’d find.

But your touch brings me happiness;
and that I want so much.

I believe in my dream; in your love for me;
and to believe is the most beautiful thing that could ever be.

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Insanity I

What is real?

Unto my eyes, my fantasies are real
My thoughts float on and on
like the familiar words of an old time song.

What is real?
What is not?

Feelings lost, feelings sought

Reality is in the minds of those who say
Reality is hard to find for those gone astray.

Live with me now in this time
Live with me now for you are mine
Thoughts are mine
Time is mine
Lost amid the potent wine.

Reality …

Believe with me
I believe all I see
I believe I will be lost forever
without reality.

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Dark Peace

Peaceful in the darkness
but a fading light
brings forth the only looking
in a pitch black night.

Alone,
in the shadows of final tranquility
the often noise of daylight ceases to be.

The only noises that I hear
are those of thoughts that draw too near.

Mellow moments of serenity
finally come unto me
in the almost endless darkness
of the sweet black night.

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